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Ok so about a month ago one of my exes that i am still close with (we will call him Chris) came out to me that he is bi. During that concerti action he told me that a year ago he started cutting and cuntinued till around the end of summer this year. During that time period we had dated for like two months then broke up. He also told me that his dad had tried to kill him. He did not tell me why and I kind of want to know but he isn’t ok with telling me and I respect him so I won’t pester him about it. That same week my most recent ex that I still am close with ( will call him ginger) also told me about how he used to self harm and also tried killing himself on three seperate occasions. It was a lot to take in in a week and I felt like I can’t do anything to help them as they are both still majorly depressed. Then two o my other friends told me that they self harm and are depressed. I feel like crap cause I can’t do anything to help them. I am also trying to figure out how I am going to come out to my friends and family that I am bi. About 2 weeks ago I started cutting and not really caring about anything. Right know I don’t feel suicidal but if I was in the middle of a road and a car was heading towards me and wouldn’t stop I wouldn’t really get out of its way. I just don’t know what to do anymore and no one knows what I am going through and they are all oblivious about what is going on with me and I feel like I can’t talk to anyone about thats why I am wrighting this massage.
It is brave of you to reach out and share your story. It sounds like others see you as a supportive person who is good at listening, but it also leaves you feeling a bit powerless. It must be tough to cope with these intense feelings about violence, suicide, and self harm – especially when you identify with some of them as well. You should be proud of yourself for being helpful, but sometimes we need to make sure we are getting the support we need too.
You mentioned that you do not feel suicidal per se, but might put your life in danger if the circumstances were right. With all that you are going through right now it would be helpful to talk to someone. Please consider calling our 24/7 Lifeline at 866-488-7386. Please also consider reaching out to someone you trust, preferably an adult, such as a family member, counselor, neighbor, teacher, or anyone else you think could help.
You have more power than you think. It would be helpful to encourage your friends to give us a call and talk to an adult they trust regarding their suicidal thoughts and self-harm. I can imagine it is a lot of pressure, but it can be really helpful for everyone in involved. Please continue to be the supportive and caring person you are and point them in the right direction.
Coming out can be a very individual process and difficult when it comes to figuring out how and when to do it. It can be helpful to think about the pros and cons of coming out – how will people react, do you have support, and what might you do if things go really bad?
Cutting can be one way to deal with these overwhelming emotions, but it is important to think about some of the consequences. It can lead to infections, accidents, and permanent scarring. Checking these sites out can be helpful: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/self_injury.htm and http://www.selfinjury.com/.
If you’re looking to talk to other young people going through similar issues as you are, you can check out TrevorSpace, our social network for LGBTQ youth and allies. It can be a great way to make friends and find support from all around the world. The address for TrevorSpace is http://www.trevorspace.org . TrevorSpace also has a discussion forum called Q&Q (Queer and Questioning) where you can post questions and discuss what you’re going through with thousands of other LGBTQ young people on http://www.trevorspace.org/topics.cfm?src=1 . Also, there are other resources and communities that can help specifically with gender: http://www.genderadvocates.org/Tyra/TYRALinks.html , http://www.transyouthsupportnetwork.org/ , http://www.lauras-playground.com/trans_support_groups.htm .
It can be very challenging to reach out and put your feelings on the line. Even though it might feel uncomfortable at first, please give our 24-hour Lifeline a call at 866-488-7386. Our trained counselors are really great at making you feel comfortable and helping out with the situation. If you need immediate support, please call 911 or visit a hospital to get help from a mental health professional. We all need help sometimes and remember you are not alone. Please continue to be brave and reach out for more help.
It would be nice to get some help!!!!!!
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The seconed sentence is supposed to say :during that conversation he told me that a year ago he started cutting and continued till around the end of summer this year.
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