Welcome to Ask Trevor

Ask Trevor is an online question and answer resource for young people who have questions surrounding sexual orientation and gender identity.

On September 1st, Ask Trevor will be transitioning to become a broader more effective resource for LGBTQ young people and their allies. This means we will no longer be accepting incoming letters starting on Tuesday, September 2nd. However, if you send us a letter before September 2nd, you will receive a response. Please note that your wait time may be longer than usual. In the meantime, please continue to browse through our extensive library of previously answered letters, and stay tuned for what’s coming next!

If you are feeling suicidal, or need to talk to someone right away, please call the Trevor Lifeline at 1-866-488-7386. It’s available 24/7, 365 days a year. You can also chat with a Trevor counselor at Trvr.org/Chat from 12:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m. PT / 3:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. ET.

Please note: If you live outside of the United States and need to talk to someone, please seek help at the nearest emergency room or check out the following international hotlines: http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html

You are never alone. Thank you for reaching out to The Trevor Project for support!

Is this site just for LGBT kids?

Question:

I am wondering if this site is just for LGBT people because even though I am not any of those, I do have problems with depression and with people just not accepting me even though I am making the best effort I can to be friends with them. Also the factor of people telling me that I am lying when I tell them I don’t have friends and they just smile at me as if I am just being silly. When indeed it is true.

Answer:

Dear Jennihawk,
While Ask Trevor specializes and focuses on lgbtq youth, there is room for everyone. You do not have to be lgbtq to feel lonely, have trouble making friends, or be depressed. 14 years old is a rough time for everyone and we could all use a little help sometimes. Making friends can also be a challenge, but stick with it and try to be patient. It might be easier if you started by getting involved in activities you are interested in. This will give you some similar interests and something to talk about. It must be hard to hear people trivialize how hard making friends is by thinking you’re being silly but don’t let it bother you and know it is not just you being silly. It is a difficult subject and those probably don’t know what to say. Finally, depression is a medical issue, meaning it is something a doctor can help you with. Is there a trusted adult you can talk with about this? A parent, a relative, a teacher, a guidance councilor, or even your doctor would all work. You can look at http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001941/or http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/depression/what-is-depression.shtml to find more information.

Trevor Staff